I don't like this 'being off work' lark at all. I have been off work for four days now and already I'm staying up too late, eating too much, drinking too much and getting up later and later. I'm also losing the will to move, it seems. I mean I am not getting any exercise at all, just sitting on my bum wherever possible. And when you are off work there is a lot of possible.

Help me, please, before I turn into a lazy lardarse with a drink problem.